Chapter 52
I drop to my knees with a thud, barely registering the impact. Jack looks like he’s having some kind of seizure, his entire body spasming violently. I don’t know what to do, just vaguely think I should maybe put something between his teeth so he doesn’t bite through his tongue, but when I look frantically around, there is nothing I can use.
“No!” Caden shouts behind me, and I glance back. He and Silas wrestle, and it looks like they are fighting over the knife. I turn back to Jack when the drumming of his feet over the floor quietens, his body calming down until he just lies there, chest rising and falling in deep, calm breaths.
He seems asleep.
“Jack?” I ask carefully, cupping his cheek. It’s warm. And he’s breathing, I reassure myself, looking over him to check for any injuries, but he seems completely intact. In perfect health. Only, he doesn’t react to my touch.
“Jack? Jack!”
I shake him, and his body is so completely relaxed, it jostles easily. But his face remains calm, his eyelids and mouth still, not a single sign of consciousness. I force myself to swallow a sob and feel under his jaw for his pulse. It’s calm and strong, just like his breathing.
The bickering sounds of Silas’s and Caden’s scuffle stop, and Caden crouches by my side, looking at Jack with a frown. He holds the knife in one hand, and he raises the other, a grim smile stretching his lips. Next thing I know, he slaps Jack hard across the face until his head jerks to the side and then slowly rolls back.
“What are you doing?” I ask, a touch of hysteria creeping into my voice because Jack is still out cold. Not even that slap woke him up.
“I always wanted to do that,” Caden says, rubbing his chin with a scratchy sound. “Not to Jack. Just generally, you know. To someone unconscious.”
He chuckles under his breath, but I don’t have it in me to laugh. I watch helplessly as redness spreads on Jack’s cheek, his skin reacting to Caden’s slap, but his body is completely still. “What happened?” I ask without looking away.
“My idiot lover thought it was the dawn and we were losing our bodies. He panicked a bit. Tried to stab you,” Caden says dryly, hefting the knife in his hand. “But it’s evidently not that. Jack still has a body. And we’re still here. I told Silas to blow off some steam.”
Muffled sounds register, panicked screams and moans from Greg and Ryan, growing louder and more intense. I slowly look over at them, just in time to see Silas shattering Ryan’s kneecap with a moist crunch that makes bile rise in my throat. He wields my frying pan with deadly confidence, movements fluid as he brings it down in a smooth arc, not even stopping to aim.
And, I don’t know. I just killed Michael. He is right there, blood still slowly dripping from the seat of his chair into the slick puddle underneath that looks like it’s about to start congealing, and… I feel nothing.
But the violence of Silas breaking the other two apart makes me nauseous. He’s methodical about it, his jaw hard, eyes set as he shatters Ryan’s other knee and proceeds to do the same to Greg, who wakes up and makes inhuman, horrible sounds of suffering. There’s a little puddle of blood under his chair, too.
“Well, boys,” Silas says, panting breaths falling out of his demonically grinning mouth. “This is what happens when you rape a girl. It’s a lesson not just to you, but to everyone else who will hear about what happened here. They’ll know. And even as they pity you publicly, some will dance and celebrate in private. You know why? Because scum like you doesn’t deserve to live.”
He bashes Ryan’s shoulder with the frying pan, making his face grow bloodless as he heaves in the chair, body spasming in agony. More thuds and sickening crunches follow, and I can’t look at this any longer. I swallow, doing my best to contain my visceral reaction, and look back to Jack.
“Baby, wake up,” I say, cradling his face in my shaking fingers. “Come on, Jack. This isn’t the time to be sleeping!”
Because… Silas is right. I don’t even know how much time we have left, and really, the sun could rise at any moment. If I want them to be free, I should die. Like, now.
Doing so without saying goodbye to Jack for one last time will break my heart, but thankfully, it won’t stay broken for long. Just until I’m gone.
And I don’t even want to think about what will happen after. I might just be gone forever. There is something terrifying about the thought. Just disappearing, like I never existed. Gone without making a good mark on the world. Only bad decisions, poor actions, misery, and death in my wake.
But then, the thought of becoming nothingness, of just melting into the big black of the universe, is comforting, too. No more suffering. No more mistakes. Just nothing.
“Silas,” I say quietly after dropping a goodbye kiss on Jack’s warm, soft lips. “I think we should do it. Just get it over with. Before it’s too late.”
He turns away from the two twitching, mauled heaps of bones that no longer look human—just grotesque and pitiful—and comes over to me. “No,” he says softly, startling me. “I don’t think I can kill you, angel. I’m sorry.”
“What…” I don’t finish, staring into his handsome face. He no longer looks demonic, all his rage and murderous glee just gone. Silas looks tired and a bit wry, like he used up all his anger and has nothing left. Nothing left for me.
“But we had a deal,” I say, my voice plaintive. “What am I supposed to do now?”
He grabs the back of my head and lowers his forehead to mine, exhaling slowly as we touch. I close my eyes, drinking in his closeness as lazy sparks blink into existence in the back of my head. Even now. After everything.
“Figure out an iron-clad alibi for tonight,” he says quietly.
I reel back, breaking the comforting contact, and just stare at him. “What the fuck, Silas?”
He doesn’t reply, just looking at me with a sad smile. All the sharp lines of his face are softened, the wrinkles in the corners of his eyes and around his mouth more prominent. No longer standing straight and arrogant like he owns the world, Silas hunches slightly, weariness clear in the set of his shoulders.
“You’ll be free after tonight,” he says finally, glancing at Caden who stands by my side, saying nothing. “You’re getting the thing that I’ve always wanted for myself, but could only get for you. And, I don’t know. I think I want you to enjoy your life now. For both of us.”
I shake my head, tears springing to my eyes. I wipe them away angrily, pissed at myself for feeling so weak, so utterly devastated. It seems like I’ve finally reached my limit for tonight. I can’t keep the tears from spilling.
Because this feels like rejection, and it hurts so much, my heart wants to burst.
“Y-you don’t want me,” I choke out, pressing my hands to my mouth and desperately trying to calm down.
Silas makes a frustrated sound, and Caden wraps his arms around me, stroking my back. I turn to him and soak up his warmth, shaking but not sobbing, at least.
“Wrong, angel. I care about you so much, I’ll sacrifice our freedom for you. So fucking take it and be grateful.”Property © NôvelDrama.Org.
“Caden,” I say, ignoring Silas completely. “You have to do it. Please. I can’t go back out there without you. I can’t.”
“You can,” he speaks into my hair, and I immediately push him away, stumbling back. “Being a ghost is shitty, little bird. And you’re so young. Everything is ahead of you.”
I take a shaky breath, doing my best to gather my thoughts so I can make a convincing argument. But Greg’s and Ryan’s pitiful whimpers and sobs distract me, and every time I feel like I have a solid thread of thought, it unravels, until I burst out in anger.
“But this is the entire point of this night!” I scream, looking wildly from Caden to Silas. “You’ve planned this for two fucking years! How can you stop now?”
Silas shakes his head with a nasty laugh, a bit of his cruelty returning to sharpen his features as he looks at me with mocking eyes. “Shouldn’t have made it so easy to fall for you, angel,” he says in a hard voice. “It’s your fault. Made me fucking care.”
I laugh bitterly, walking over to him with my fists clenched tight. “If you care, help me stay with you!”
He snorts derisively, and when I raise my fists, not intending to do anything, just gearing myself, he catches both my palms in his hands and leans in, grinning his unhinged smile.
“There is no fucking way for you to stay with us.” He speaks right in my face, voice intense, but quiet. “This is all bullshit Jack made up because he’s desperate. If you die, we’ll all be gone.”
I struggle to free my hands, but he holds me tightly, tugging me even closer as his frenzied eyes bore into mine. “And before you showed up, being free was the only thing I cared about. I just wanted to fucking die. But guess what, angel? Now I care about you more. How does that feel? All fluttery and warm?”
He mocks me so cruelly, I just want to hit him now, but he won’t let go of my hands. I groan in frustration, trying to get free, because fuck, if he won’t do it, I’ll do it myself. I won’t live my life alone. There is nothing for me out there.
We fight in silence, Silas’s grin gaining a hungry edge when I struggle against him, his body too strong, his hold too sure to throw off. I huff, turning, and he snakes one hand around my waist.
“Caden, finish the other two so at least it’s done before we’re gone.”
But Caden doesn’t do what Silas says. He stares at Jack, frowning, and as I follow his line of sight, I gasp.
Jack’s awake.