Chapter 65
Chapter Twenty-nine Kenna
Thinking back of the way he reacted and how he left without saying goodbye or bothered as I was the one who was supposed to drop him off-it's starting to tense me, more and more.
"Kenna," I turn around to see Lucas walking towards me with a smile plastered on his face; both of his green eyes are piercing deeply into mine without showing any signs of looking away in the nearest future. "How you've been?"
My lips curve up into a smile, "Fine. How about you? Still getting high demands?" I ask, receiving a light chuckle from him as he shoves his hand into his coat's pocket.
"Can't run away from that," He grins, continuing to look at me as his mind wanders off to think. "Is it too late to ask you out for lunch?" His voice almost inaudible as the hallway is being filled with busy doctors and nurses walking around, tending to their patients.
"I just ate," I answer with a small smile on my face; it's not that I wouldn't want to have lunch with Lucas but something as simple as having lunch with him can lead into more people might know that I'm married and he's aware of that but I fear being the one who might trip and fall.
"Ah... I really need to work on my timing, don't I?" He asks, slightly squinting his eyes as we both break out into a laugh.
I shove both of my hands into my pockets before clearing my throat, "Did you come to my department just to ask me out for lunch?" My question came out a little bit more obvious than intended as he tries to hide away his embarrassment by smiling down at his feet. "Isn't it obvious?" He raises an eyebrow, "Should've asked you sooner-probably a year or two sooner, maybe then... I'd consider it the perfect timing." He says, leaving me to understand the words he said, seeing as it had a different meaning. I chuckle, "You need to be twenty years sooner."
His eyes widen before laughing, revealing his pearly whites. "Yikes... I guess my time was long up, huh? Too bad," He continues to smile, leaving me to mesmerise just how his green eyes matches well with someone as attractive as him.
We both stare at one another, not uttering a single word afterwards as I'm deeply sinking in my own thoughts-wondering if things could really turn out to be different if I ever made different choices. What if mum chosen a different kindergarten? What if I didn't pursue to become a doctor? Those kind of questions will forever remain unanswered.
"I'll see you around, Lucas." I say as I smile before starting to walk away.
"Kenna!" Lucas calls out my name, causing me to turn and see him standing in the middle of the hallway near the information counter where nurses have already looked up at him, "My offer still stands... you know where to find me," He says with a grin, making me laugh before shaking my head and walking down the hallway.
I walk straight towards Albert's room, seeing him staring out the window which causes me to breathe out, knowing his thoughts are mostly filled to be about his late wife.
Slowly, I begin to knock onto the door as he turns to look at me slight surprised to see my presence, "Knock knock, Grumpy Pants. How are you today?" I ask, a wide smile begins to appear on my face, trying to hide away the sadness overcoming me. "Better now that you're here," He replies.
We both laugh, "Here are your prescriptions for today... you know the rules, Albert." I say and he sighs, nodding his head but doesn't make any movement or glance to look at the pills.
"Deep in thoughts?" I ask, trying to break the silence between us-it's always like this with him. We always have a session of pouring different kind of things daily, just to make sure that he's able to let someone know how he feels while I listen, considering him as an old friend. "I heard about what happened when I was gone, do you want to talk about that?"
"The nightmares came again that night. It was unintentional, Kenna-you know me, don't you?" Hint of regret glisters in his eyes as I nod, taking a seat beside him; wanting to hear everything that he has to tell me, showing him that he has all the support that he needs from me.
"Maybe... it's time for you to tell me about your nightmares. That way, I can probably help you." My eyebrows furrow as he shakes his head, letting me let out a sigh of disappointment.
"And throw me to the psychiatric ward? Just because I can't get over the thoughts of her?" The look on his face confuses me, deep down, I know that he's hiding something because he might not trust me much and I truly understand.
"What makes you think I'd do that? I would never do that to you, Albert-you have to trust me. I'm always going to be there for you, no matter how stupid or insane it is to make you stay. I'm your doctor and I have certain responsibilities and one of them is to understand you," I begin to stand up, walking towards the other side to make sure that I get a glimpse of his features as he turns away.
We stay quiet for a little while as I keep my eyes glued to him, not looking away. The sunlight pouring in from the window has somehow attracted his attention as his features soften, looking down at the handkerchief in his hand, holding it tightly; as if holding onto a certain memory.
"She was there-in my dreams, she
was standing there with this wrapped around her neck. The same beautiful eyes, staring back at me as she smiled... the same smile that had fallen for. Everything about her was clear to me but I was still and I couldn't move," He starts to speak, making me listen-trying to i imagine by how he had told me, her beautiful pair of eyes and smile, something he would always mention when he tells
me stories about her.
"I was frozen, static while she disappeared. She disappeared into the light and I couldn't do anything to make her stay," He adds, his eyes are filled with tears that had managed to escape as he tries to control his breaths.
His eyes meet mine, "I am a
disappointment to her. When she
passed, everything around me was falling apart. my son, our son, I've never had the chance to see him again. don't even know where he is-she'd be disappointed in me for letting her down, for making our family break," Pain is clear in his voice as he speaks while 1 am leftContent from NôvelDr(a)ma.Org.
standing at the same spot, not
knowing what to do or how to react.
In front of me is a man who had fallen in love with the woman he gazed upon, the same woman he had married when there were obstacles they had to face but they did. Now, all he can do is blame himself for her death and the disappearance of their son, something far from what I can help.
"It's not your fault. How can you say that to yourself? It was a dream, Albert... it was a bad dream and it was only making you think. She won't hate or be disappointed in you for something you can't control. You loved her... deeply, truly and she would understand how that inflected pain." I reply, wanting to comfort him, at least a little bit.
"I need rest. Can you come see me tomorrow?" He asks with a small smile plastered on his face while I nod, assuring him.
My eyes fixed onto the ground in front of me as I am deeply buried in my own thoughts, holding the bread in my hands without having intentions to take a bite of it. Sitting alone on the bench at the hospital's park seems to be a great way to ease my tension but all I can feel is more and more stress radiating.
I lean back before looking up at the sky, seeing it blue and bright, hurting my eyes if I bother to stare any longer-making me drop my head in between my hands, closing my eyes.
"Is it still bothering you?" I tense as I hear a familiar voice in front of me which causes me to look up, seeing an attractive figure looking back at me; his brown eyes lightening due to the sunlight.
The way his hair is messily being blown by the wind and how his eyes are never looking away from mine leaves me in oblivion, "You're you're here." I mutter under my breath.
Aidan takes a seat beside me, "Can I be completely honest with you, Kenna?" He asks.
My eyes wander away from his, scared of something he might say; something that might impact me in ways I can never explain but I brace myself for the worst as I nod, turning back to look at him, seeing him licking his lower lip, hesitating on whether it's best to say. "I'm feeling something," He starts, gazing onto anything but me.
"Are you sick?" I ask, earning myself a smile from him as he looks down at his pair of shoes while I think back of the words I said, was it enough to humour him as how it did? Then again, all I can sense in my voice was a slight concern.
"Perhaps. I'm not so sure myself,"
He replies as he lets out a deep sigh. "There's this tingling, funny, feeling inside of me when I look at you. Something not easy to be explained but I'm aware of it, just not fully sure of how I feel towards it. I have to admit that I was jealous with Sam.. Thated how you smiled when you talked to him even though I know that your smile is always that beautiful."